Pastor Dave's Blog
Free Range Parenting
Posted by: Pastor Dave Lee | Wednesday December 2, 2009
File under: Perspectives & Pleas
My friend Dan recently lent me his issue of TIME magazine where the cover story was an article entitled, "The Argument Against Over-Parenting." Turning to the page where the article started, I was greeted with a colorful photo of a mother wrapping her child with bubble wrap.
It was an interesting article with what I saw as two major themes: (1) That we have become over-protective of our children even in areas where the world has become safer; and (2) So many American parents have become "so obsessed with [their] kids' success that parenting turned into a form of product development."
The article referenced a woman named Lenore Skenazy who, as a columnist for the New York Sun, let her 9-year old son ride the New York City subway alone as a "ride of passage." She was exoriated by many in the media as "America's worst mom." In fact, if you Google that phrase you see Ms. Skenazy's name everywhere. In response she launched a movement and a blog called "Free Range Kids" that advocates for a more relaxed approach to parenting. On a recent visit to her blog I saw a crazy video about how some kids in a remote Columbian village ride a 1/2-mile zipline on free-hanging pulleys to get to school - the point: let's not fret over our kids walking a couple blocks to their schools.
I have mixed feelings about all of this because the world has become a more dangerous and unpredictable place. But the answer is not to abandon faith in God or to smother our children. You can draw your own conclusions but I think it's an interesting issue to think through. You can read the article for yourself online here.
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Propagating Error
Posted by: Pastor Dave Lee | Thursday July 16, 2009
File under: Perspectives & Pleas
I saw an interesting thing on Ron Edmonson's blog today where he lists the 6 most misquoted movie lines. It was funny because I've personally misquoted a number of those lines, each time being absolutely convinced that it sounded right. I never really went back to the movies to confirm because it was close enough to what I thought was right that i just went with it.
Perhaps most surprising was that the line "Beam me up, Scotty" was never used in any Star Trek tv episode or motion picture! Yet is is a line that even non-Trekkies recognize and associate with the franchise.
I remember putting together this quiz for my students when I was a youth pastor in Philadelphia, where i put a bunch of quotes on the page and asked them to identify whether each was from the Bible or Shakespeare. To further fool them I put some lines in that were from neither source but many of them swore that lines like, "God helps those who help themselves" was from the BIble. I guess to them it just sounded right...sounded biblical.
Paul commended the Bereans in Acts 17:11 because (according to the NLT), "They searched the Scriptures day after day to check up on Paul and Silas, to see if they were really teaching the truth." Misquoting a movie line does not carry any serious consequences, but each time we say something that "sounds" biblical but is even a little off, we are propagating an error that can have serious negative impact on people's lives.
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Remembering the Dead
Posted by: Pastor Dave Lee | Tuesday July 14, 2009
File under: Perspectives & Pleas
Much has been made of Michael Jackson's death on June 25, 2009. His memorial service was so huge it required a venue like the Staples Center. Many people gave heartfelt statements remembering and celebrating Michael's life. Despite the controversy that marked his personal life, it was nonetheless touching to hear so many speak so fondly of someone who'd touched their lives. I'd be lying if I didn't admit that Michael's music was a huge part of my own teenage years. The Thriller album will always be close to my heart.
On the same day on the other side of the world, 1st Lieutenant Brian N. Bradshaw of the 1st Battalion, 501st Parachute Infantry Regiment, 4th Airborne Brigade Combat Team, 25th Infantry Division, died of wounds suffered when a roadside bomb detonated near his vehicle in Kheyl, Afghanistan. He hailed from Steilacoom, WA and lost his life at the age of 24 in the service of his country.
I don't think it would be profitable or decent of me to try to compare these two lives because I don't know either of these men on a personal level. I imagine that both men did good to others while they were alive. And I imagine both men had flaws and shortcomings they never conquered in life. That’s pretty much the story for each of us isn't it?
Death is an occasion that makes those left behind reflect on the lives of those who have passed. Often words like "hero" are spoken to honor the dead. But I think in the final analysis it's how we live, not so much how we die, that is the measure of our lives. Someone once told me that as he wandered through a cemetery and looked at all the headstones, he reflected that our whole lives are basically the hyphen between the year of our birth and the year of our death. I hope my hyphen is worth something to God and others around me.
Michael Jackson has had his day of being remembered and then some. I just wanted to make sure that Mr. Bradshaw also got some public mention. And if you want to see a listing of all those who have lost their lives in military service go here. And remember that in addition to these two men, an estimated 150,643 other human beings passed from life to death on June 25 as well.
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Just had to post this one...
Posted by: Pastor Dave Lee | Thursday July 9, 2009
File under: Perspectives & Pleas
I've flown nearly 350,000 miles in my lifetime and have had more than a few frustrating moments with airline customer service, so when I came across this I felt I had to post it to give this guy a bit more publicity. Hope you're not offended.
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Insert object of disdain here...
Posted by: Pastor Dave Lee | Thursday October 2, 2008
File under: Perspectives & Pleas
You see them everywhere. Window decals of Calvin urinating on the object of someone's disdain. I think those stickers illustrate a very interesting human tendency to create polarities and choose sides. Think Mac vs. PC, Nikon vs. Canon, Cubs vs. Sox, Ford vs. Chevy trucks (sorry Dodge truck fans), just to name a few. And while I've defintely taken my stand on one side of several of those rivalries, I have to admit that the real differences between the two things being compared can actually be quite few.
So what is it in us that makes us so passionate about our preference for one thing over another, even when they are really not that different? I mean, have you watched a Cubs fan and a Sox fan go at it lately? And even between things where there are substantive differences, such as Democrat vs. Republican, the passion with which people stick to their sides does not always seem to arise primarily from issues. I wonder how many people on either side of the political aisle could clearly and intelligently articulate their party's or their candidates stand on all the key issues of the day.
As I've reflected on why we feel so strongly about the sides we take, I think maybe some of it has to do with a deep human need to belong to, or identify with, something. That affiliation is certainly more rewarding when your side wins some sort of contest (World Series, election, etc.). But even when your side is losing, it seems important to us as humans to care passionately about something, whether that fierce loyalty makes logical sense or not. Just talk to any Cubs fan and you'll begin to understand. Sometimes our present loyalties are rooted more in our history. We love what we first knew, or what someone important to us taught us to love. We can arm ourselves with a list of reasons why, but in the end it is not so much about reasons as it is about how we see ourselves or who we want to be loyal to.
This has led me to consider how much the loyalty that I feel toward Christ and Christianity arises from a fresh and informed conviction day after day, or it is just a mindless defense of the side I've chosen. Am I a Christian simply because I was born into a Christian family and took for myself the faith of parents I deeply love and respect?
And I certainly hope that I can lift up the beauty and virtue of Christ and his way of life without having to resort to the conversational equivalent of having Calvin urinate on something or someone else's treasure.
Now, if I could just apply that same line of thinking to the way I feel about Apple computers, maybe I'd have more friends. :-)
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The Gift of Giving
Posted by: Pastor Dave Lee | Sunday December 16, 2007
File under: Perspectives & Pleas
About a week ago I received a letter from someone named Matt Dalio of the Dalio Family Foundation. He was writing to encourage me to join him in a growing movement to make Christmas gift giving more charitable.
He lamented the runaway consumerism and materialism that marks the Christmas season. He wanted to find a way to nurture the beautiful practice of gift giving while without fueling the shopping craze.
His suggestion was that we ask our friends and family to give a charitable gift in our name instead of buying something for us. He suggested going to the web site www.redefinechristmas.org to find out more.
That site points to another site called www.justgive.org that makes it so easy to give an online donation to over 1 million registered charitable organizations. I searched and found that our good friends at GRIP were registered!
It may be a bit late for this Christmas, but maybe it would be a beautiful way to promote the true spirit of Christmas next year by starting early and getting the word out. Hey, I figure that means more time at home with loved ones instead of out at the mall amidst the craziness. Sounds very appealing to me...
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We Remember What We See
Posted by: Pastor Dave Lee | Thursday October 4, 2007
File under: Perspectives & Pleas
My brother Steve always jokes that I have a terrible memory. Quite often when he hears me give a sermon illustration using a childhood memory, he’ll call or write to give me the historically correct version of the event I was describing. I’ll be the first to admit that his memory is far better than mine. He actually remembers the sounds and smells of the airport the day we landed in the United States for the first time!
It may be true that my memories are not always historically accurate. They may only be my subjective version of what happened and not the factual truth. But it strikes me that it is my perception of what happened and not just the events themselves that shape who I am. Even if the actual facts may be lost to me forever, my version of history stays with me, becomes my autobiographical reality, and continues to exert its influence over my life.
It may be cliché to say it today, but attitude matters. All memories—in fact, all history—is arguably subjective. Historical events pass through a filter of selective retention and we remember what we want and how we saw it. We like to say that the events of our lives shape who we are. I would argue that it is our attitudes about those events that shape who we are.
Our attitudes even shape our memories. A family could experience financial ruin on a single terrible day, and one sibling will recall it as the day that they lost all hope in the future while another will remember it as the day she realized how much she’d taken her blessings for granted. Two siblings who live through the same historical event approach it with different attitudes and emerge with radically different memories.
How has your attitude shaped the memories you hold onto? How historically accurate are your memories? What difference would it make today if you realized the shaping power of attitude?
Addendum - 10.05.07
I was recently reading a friend's blog and he had this quote that I thought really spoke to this present post: "We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are." -- Anais Nin
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